Truth be told, I’m writing this blog post on November 2nd, the day before Election Day. So I don’t know yet what’s in store for the next 24 hours, but no matter the outcome, I am feeling comforted by the fact that November 4th, Wednesday, is one of my very favorite days of the year. It’s National Sex Toy Day, baby! And with your permission, I’d like to focus this conversation, at least for today, on something I think we all (no matter our political views) can appreciate...PLEASURE. ;)

But why should sex toys get an entire day on the calendar? WHY NOT?!? I mean, seriously. If “Talk Like a Pirate Day” is somehow thriving after all these years, I think sex toys deserve their time in the spotlight, right? And it’s not just because they are fun to gossip about, but also because every year we make the conscious decision to celebrate, unapologetically, we are choosing to normalize the many benefits of sex toys. And normalizing the benefits of sex toys is, quite honestly, one of the most important things we can do for our sexual health. But what are those benefits, exactly?

I’m so glad you asked. According to CalExotics’ resident sexologist, Dr. Jill McDevitt - who is a total badass, by the way, and has three (yes THREE!) degrees in human sexuality - those benefits include the following:

Relaxation, stress-reduction and self care. Stress is a normal part of life for many people, particularly in 2020. And there are many ways to combat stress from regular exercise to listening to music. And we can add masturbation is on that list, too! According to Medical News Today, not only does masturbation help reduce stress – it also helps release tension, enhance sleep quality, boost concentration, elevate mood, relieve menstrual cramps, alleviate pain, and improve sex. In short, masturbation is a beneficial activity to add to your regular self care routine.

Body and pleasure exploration. Sex experts agree that masturbation is the best way to get to know yourself intimately. Sex toys give you the opportunity to try different sensations and explore different body parts in a relaxed and judgement-free zone. Consider them both educational and erotic at the same time.

Sexual satisfaction. Masturbating with sex toys can be incredibly pleasurable, whether you are in a relationship or you’re single. If you are single, it can take the pressure off needing a partner to have a great sex life. And if you’re in a relationship, sex toys can actually lead to better sexual encounters with your s.o., because they can help you better understand and communicate what feels good and what doesn’t. In fact, one study published in the Journal of Sex Education and Therapy showed that women who masturbated had happier marriages!

Expanding your sexual repertoire (alone or with a partner). The beautiful thing about sex toys is that they literally come in all different shapes and sizes. Some vibrate and flicker. Others thump or provide warming sensations. The varieties are endless, and if you take the time to explore them solo or with your partner, you get a newfound sense of adventure that can lead to even more excitement in bed. This is particularly useful for those in a long-term relationships who are looking to keep their sex lives exciting and new.

Fun! This one goes without saying, but sex toys – and how they make you feel – are absolutely exhilarating. Pleasure is a joy...and we are all deserving of that!

If all that doesn’t make it 100 percent, crystal-clear why I love National Sex Toy Day, I don’t know what to tell you. Relaxation, self care, pleasure, satisfaction, fun, and exploration? I mean, come on. No really...COME on! (Get it, get it!?) All jokes aside, please give me permission – amidst this crazy week – to celebrate this day that I hold so near and dear to my heart. And with that, I’m off to go buy myself a new wand. I need to destress. ;)

~ Jesse Hart